“Which one of you bitches can claim she had a starring role in a Beyoncé video?!? That’s right, only Mrs. Lisa is cool enough for Mrs. Carter!”
“I am Louisa –or was it Brigitta? That’s right; I’m the blonde one from the sound of music and you can’t even remember my name!”
“I may be the most celebrated magical historian of the century, but ironically enough will go down in history as the scary old hag whose head burst open to unveil a ferocious man-eating snake.”
“You must have heard of my ongoing juridical battle with the city council of London, holding me accountable for all the damage caused by bird poop to historical buildings. All around the cathedral, saints and apostles are getting disfigured by acid excrements, so they claim, and I am supposed to take the blame.”
“Once again, I am sò sorry for jumping out of the window, landing on, and running off with the milkman.”